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The Strawberry Letter: Nothing Has Changed Since She Got Her Ring

Dear Steve and Shirley,

I'm about to marry an intense woman and she stays lit, meaning she doesn't know when enough is enough. It was fun when we first met and we were out every night, or we'd take a limo ride to Chicago for dinner and have sex and a limo on our way home. She would shop all day and get me as many nice things as she bought herself. We have a lot of money between us, so it was not an issue.

I did a big thing and I bought a big ring and decided to settle down. We're both forty one, so it's time to stop kicking it and get serious about marriage. We bought a house together and I let her furnish it when we still didn't have furniture. Three months later, I asked her what's up. She said, it's being shipped from overseas. I told her that was a bit excessive, and she argued that she's not settling for less when it comes to any part of her life.

I should have taken that as a warning, but I kept letting her spend a lot of money, and I started paying all of the bills. She planned a very extravagant housewarming party and I picked up the check. Since I gave her that ring, I've become her personal banker. I'm a real man and I want to be a provider, but it's too much for me because I'm a saver, not a spender. I also have to work hard and cannot have sex all day and night on demand.

At my age. I'm exhausted and I can't have sex twice a night like we used to. I'm worn out in more ways than one. To make matters worse, her sister is coming to visit, and she already has a car service booked for each day so they can run the streets at my expense. My wife works, but she never pulls out her credit card. Would I be wrong to ask her to cut back a bit or at least discuss major money moves with me?