Dear Steve and Shirley,
I'm a 42-year-old woman, and I recently met a man who lied about his age and several other things. He’s 6’4”, very nice-looking with curly hair, but extremely skinny. He has a large groin area—at least it looked that way—because he’s so tall, it was hard to miss. We met in a grocery store, and he stared at me for a long time before finally speaking. He said my beauty had him mesmerized. We exchanged numbers, and a few days later, we met for a drink. I would have preferred dinner for our first date, but that’s not what he offered.
That’s when he started laying it on thick with the lies. He claimed to be 48 years old and said he used to play ball in college. He told me he didn’t get the chance to go pro because he hurt his foot. He also claimed his home was being renovated, so he was staying in one of his rental properties. He never told me what he actually does for a living, but said he “dabbles in the stock market.” I enjoyed getting to know him, so I continued to spend time with him.
After about two months, I was ready to be intimate. As he got undressed, I noticed his underwear had a cup-like feature in the front—that was the bulge I’d always seen. I asked him about it, and he said a lot of men wear those to protect themselves. He also had on an undershirt, a black T-shirt, and a button-front shirt. He explained that he pads his chest because he’s so skinny.
We ended up having sex, and to my disappointment, he was small and terrible. Since that night, he has admitted that he’s actually 64, he works as a custodial manager, never played basketball, never went to college, and it’s obvious he doesn’t own a home either.
Now that he’s come clean, should I give him a chance to prove himself or break it off?