The Strawberry Letter: Please Help Me Figure My Man Out

Dear Steve and Shirley,

I'm a 51-year-old married woman, and I'm eight years older than my husband. He is successful and loves the Lord. Those were the two main things I prayed for when I was dating. God gave me exactly what I asked for, but I also got lots of things I didn't ask for.

My husband has a quick tongue and loves to talk back when I'm telling him how things should be. I know that he hasn't been exposed to much, so every chance I get, I try to get him out of his comfort zone. He wasn't used to different kinds of food, so I took him to try various seafood and shellfish. I also introduced him to high-end scotch and bourbons because he loves to drink.

He resents the fact that I understand fancy language on restaurant menus, and he gets mad when I order for us. He's told me that I might as well be the man in the relationship, and it really makes me sad for him. I'm only trying to bring him up to speed so he can get to my level and have a finer way of living. I've asked him to take me to a Broadway play for my birthday, and he told me to plan it like I plan everything else and he'll go. I took offense to that because it's time for him to take the lead.

I cannot figure this man out. If I lead, he gets upset. When I tell him what I want him to do for me, he gets upset. We've been married for almost two years, and we still have a way to go on him being cultured. If I left it up to him, we'd eat dinner in front of the TV every night, and he'd never have a passport. I took this man out of the country for the first time, so I need a little more respect from him. How could he be so resentful when I'm trying to help him experience the good life?


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