Dear Steve and Shirley,
I met a man we clicked; he showed me his representative for the first few months. Now I see some things that make me wonder if I want to continue our relationship. These are things that I think he can control, but he didn't act like this in the beginning of our relationship. He has no filter in anything he says or does, and his delivery is always so shocking.
I took him to meet my mom, and he unleashed the madness as soon as we got in her driveway. He asked if I grew up in that little house, and I could not believe him. He grew up in the projects, so I told him he had no room to judge me. He said he wasn't judging; he just asked a question. He continued to insult my mom and me. He refused to sit down because he said the dining room table was too dusty. I kept cutting my eyes at him, but he didn't get it. He is also very direct in the bedroom. Our first sexual encounter was at his house after we watched a movie.
He said that I teased him long enough with my legs all across him, and I rubbed and touched all over him, so we might as well go to the bedroom so he could give me what I really want. I was shocked but a little turned on. I had no idea that every sexual encounter would start off like this. Now he usually says something like, "Let's go ahead and get this out of the way." He told me that he's always been like this and it's probably why he's still single at 42.
I cringe when he picks me up because he's asked me more than a few times if I'm sure I want to wear what I'm wearing. So, I put him in timeout for a few days. If he's not willing to change, is there a way to tolerate this bad behavior?